This woman is beyond gorgeous.

The Dark Girls Documentary inspired my Monday Rant. Folks, please stop asking me if I’m going to go see this documentary. The answer is likely no unless someone bootlegs it and forces me to watch it. I’m so sick of these pitiful woe is me I’m a darkie Negro pity parties. I don’t relate. Here is something that might shock you. I have dark skin and I think I’m pretty freaking awesome. I never had a skin color complex. I wasn’t exposed to colorism or as I like to call it intra-racism until college when dumb Negro coon-males would say “Hey you are pretty for a dark skin girl.” I wish you guys could see my facial expression when some ignorant fool would say that. How would a black male like it if I said “Wow you are such a law-abiding citizen for a Black man!” Come on people, see how ridiculous that sounds? I also use to get the good hair comments a lot which use to infuriate my mother to the point of rage. The motto in my house growing up was “good hair is clean healthy hair.”

My face when some dummy says I’m “pretty for a dark skin girl”

Since Black folks are a bunch of self-hating downtrodden group of people we need movies and documentaries to remind of us of how much we suck at life. The Dark Girls Documentary is another manifestation of a phenomenon that talks about the problem and provides no practical solutions. That’s why Tyler Perry is so popular. Even though all his films are poorly written and the plots are beyond absurd (i.e. educated successful professional black woman who mistreat her loving blue-collar Christian husband and as rightful punishment for all her sins, she gets her ass beat and ends up as an old maid who will die of HIV) people love to see their dysfunction on the big screen because they feel connected in a world that generally makes them feel isolated.

These types of documentaries and films are multi-million dollar venting sessions for Black people to dump all their inner turmoil for public consumption. After they exposed their deep-rooted psychological issues, they return to the same defeated existence instead of getting help. These people aren’t changed for the better but they get sympathy from gullible viewers. These victims become a circus act so people can look to them and thank White Baby Jesus that they aren’t *that* dysfunctional. Sometimes they join other victims in similar circumstances and make pity party packs. Now they can sit in their crying circle venting over past mistreatment and hug it out until the next session. These type of films and documentaries have victims screaming to society “Please love and accept me!” because they prefer pity over hatred.

I get it…no never mind that’s a lie. I don’t. My parents didn’t raise me to feel inferior because of my skin color. Yes I’m a darkie and proud. Maybe I’m an anomaly. Who knows? I love my skin color. I don’t have wrinkles. I will probably look awesome for a long time. I think people who bleach or lighten their skin are stupid. You look ashy and will probably get cancer as a result of your stupidity.  My grandma is a proud Black Jamaican woman. My great-grandmother was a Maroon. She was dark with kinky hair down to her butt. She was dark and proud when it wasn’t even popular to feel that way. I grew up being told that I have pretty skin. I know feel free to hate. Roll your eyes and suck your teeth because I don’t care. I LOVE BEING DARK. I think it’s awesome. I really do.

I recognize that a significant population of dark skin Black people around the world grew up feeling vilified due to their melanin content. Here is the deal, you are grown now. If you are still young, listen up anyway. None of us come from perfect backgrounds or families. As an adult you pretty much know by now where your strengths and weaknesses are so address them. If you have a complex about having dark skin, work it out. If that means you need to look in the mirror every day of your darkie life and say you are the most beautiful thing walking the earth then do it. Fake it until you make it. Words bring life or death. Words have power. Trust me when I say that if you start telling yourself every day you are beautiful, that amazing brain of yours is going to start working those neurons and believe words coming from your mouth.

Stop engaging people who don’t value you. So many black women foam at the mouth over illiterate bottom feeder nigrum rappers or entertainers who make disparaging comments about dark skin women. Ladies, please ignore these fools and allow us to see the day where their dumb opinions become irrelevant as their short-lived careers. Don’t post the stupid their garbage on Facebook and get into an emotional frenzy. You are giving these fools free publicity. Unless they are paying you fat checks, don’t promote them. To get rid of a cancer, you starve it loves. Do you really value the opinions of trolls like Lil Wayne or some other walking sideshow freak. If your validation comes from a motherf-er who overdosed on cough syrup, I need you to go see a psychiatrist immediately and ask for divine intervention. That’s like a crack-whore telling me I’m not good enough. Come on people. Utilize common sense please.

Oh yeah this dude’s opinion really matters. ::EYE ROLL::

Don’t get caught up on other people’s preferences. There are people who prefer light skin over dark but they are not your problem. Date people who appreciate your beauty instead of trying to undo years of brainwashing. You are not captain save-a-dumb-ass-idiot. Don’t waste mental energy trying to figure them out. There are enough people in this world that find me attractive. The same applies for you. Stop focusing on people who don’t prefer you. Not everyone is going to find you attractive. I had a black male tell me once, “well I usually don’t like dark skin girls but I’ll make an exception for you.” My head spun around à la Exorcise style and told that fool to eat poop and kick rocks. You also don’t need to bash people who have a lighter complexion to feel good about yourself either. That’s just another level of hatred that’s unnecessary.You have to believe you are the best thing walking since Godiva chocolate cake (which is delicious). People on a subconscious level detect how you feel about yourself and treat you accordingly. When you believe you are an amazing and beautiful person, others will pick up on that energy. This takes practice which means you will have to discipline yourself and watch your consumption habits. Stop listening or watching media that causes you to feel lowly. Stay away from people who negatively impact your self-esteem. If that means breaking up with that emotionally abusive guy or not hanging out with the pity party clique then do it. Find beauty in what you do have. Maybe you have skin smooth as butter. Maybe you are in amazing shape or have big pretty eyes. Learn to cultivate your look and appreciate what you do have. And for the love of God, stop turning to these films for validation. Your worth comes from inside, not from pain porn profiteers.